Hey
It's amazing how much of our childhood we take with us as we grow and supposedly mature. Sure, we evolve. We form opinions on important topics which we couldn't fully comprehend as children like religion, war, love, hate etc. And our future experiences shape us as humans. But in the end, at our very core, we carry so many characteristics from when we were children. I'm talking about basic thoughts that we're not even realizing that we're doing at the time. Perhaps that's just genetics that is following us. I won't get into the science of that because frankly I'm just not smart enough. But it is entertaining thought. Anyway, to be more specific, I guess I'm implying that our initial reactions to certain moments will likely resemble our reactions as children, whether that means you were an angry child, a calmer type child or a sensitive child.
I've come to the conclusion that this holds true with me. I'm a very sensitive person. And I say that to myself and it's an obvious duh type of moment. But I like to explore that feeling and go deeper. I ask myself questions like when did feeling sensitive start. What was my first memory of sensitivity? (I wrote about that in Where's My Sticker collection last year. The answer is Kindergarten) Will I forever be this way? Is there anything wrong with that? So it's definitely overwhelming to really observe trends and what's more overwhelming is attempting to break those trends that have been cemented by time. In Balloon I explored a specific side to my sensitivity, which is how I respond to positive feedback and compliments and how I decide to process it in my head. This is personal, but sometimes I just don't feel worthy of certain kind words. Maybe because it's a bit rare, and I'm hard on myself in my own way (unfortunately not so much a motivational way) but sometimes compliments can make me cringe. It's weird because I work hard certain times for approval and crave that level of acceptance so badly, you would think I'd feel accomplished. I have the guts to put my creativity out there so why do I squirm when it's being received a certain way? For lack of a better word, it sucks. And obviously negative feedback makes me feel bad too. Catch 22...
So this one discusses that idea. It doesn't really give answers. But it just goes in to detail of how/when these feelings occur and I compare my ego to something as fragile as a balloon and how if you squeeze it too tight, it will pop and if it goes too high, it'll disappear. It's one of the best uses of metaphor I've used in a bit. The rhyming works well too here. At least I can sort of give myself compliments. Ha.
This was a gratifying piece to write about because I've never explored the feeling before when writing. It is the more vulnerable writings but hopefully that's why it can work.
Thanks.
Friday, September 24, 2010
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Quick thought
Although the unknown can be a daunting place, good things are going to happen. It's starting now. The challenges are right there and I'm ready to face them, one day at a time. I'm ready to go... ( Wait, that's from some obscure 90's song).
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
The Making of..."On Second Thought"
Hi.
As I probably mentioned before, I'm always trying to find new and creative ways to write about the same topics I have in the past. I'm assuming that a lot of real professional writers perform a similar practice. This just broadens the possibilities of how you can express these thoughts. "On Second Thought" is funny, sad and is familiar ground. I really enjoyed doing this one. I basically took the common topic of the supposed rebounding phase that a person may encounter after a breakup. It's something I've done in the past, some comedically and some were a bit more dramatic. I wanted to tell a story during this poem. I mean, they all tell stories in some form. But I wanted it to read like a short story with rhyming elements involved. I attempted this style about 2 years ago and have fallen in love with it since. I think it just helps me think about different elements I wouldn't otherwise, like dialogue which I always love to write (but seemingly rarely like to partake in) setting, mood...That's it. It helps set the mood. And I think the reader recognizes that mood and can immediately relate to the experience. Those seem to be people's favorites.
This starts with a guy who's on a date with this interesting and sweet person. It's all really inner dialogue and his reactions to what's going on in front of him. On the outside, he's very polite and outgoing. However, inside he's very smug, defiant, almost angry. Most importantly, in denial. Rather than enjoying the moment and this person's company, he stews in his head and tries to prove to, I guess, himself that he's gracefully moved on from this past relationship. He compares women and has this "see, I told you so," mentality. The funny thing is that he doesn't see how self destructive this train of thought is. And that's because he's too involved in these feelings. As a reader who is outside the box, you see how evident it is. In one part, he says, "I don't give you a second thought," but right after that, he gives that person more and more thought. This self contradiction was very funny to create and watch unfold. The end of the piece serves as the revelation and that is quite sad, but very healthy and right.
I mean, discussing these things are tricky because I'm such a guarded person. But by writing about these topics, people may make the connection and assumption that this is exactly what I'm going through. I'm usually hesitant to admit that stuff and say that it's sort of objective or just about an idea I had. And sometimes that's very truth. But you know what? I'm going to do something different this time. This is absolutely about myself and personal experience. Some of it is embellished and certain aspects are added, but the feeling is directly from my heart with this one. I won't give the timeline, but to give you an idea, this is based on something that happened months ago. There you go! Felt good. I've been thinking a lot about this. The idea that all the situations I am seemingly so afraid of are the same ones that I sometimes voluntarily put myself in. It was like that in college. And it's like that in my creative ventures. Ironic how that works. And I think that's one of the many struggles I face: Trying to coincide that fear with the excitement that I have deep inside for those same things... I don't know. By the way, that's another topic I'm writing about. Although I'm not too sure many people will relate to that.
Well that's all for now.
Thanks.
As I probably mentioned before, I'm always trying to find new and creative ways to write about the same topics I have in the past. I'm assuming that a lot of real professional writers perform a similar practice. This just broadens the possibilities of how you can express these thoughts. "On Second Thought" is funny, sad and is familiar ground. I really enjoyed doing this one. I basically took the common topic of the supposed rebounding phase that a person may encounter after a breakup. It's something I've done in the past, some comedically and some were a bit more dramatic. I wanted to tell a story during this poem. I mean, they all tell stories in some form. But I wanted it to read like a short story with rhyming elements involved. I attempted this style about 2 years ago and have fallen in love with it since. I think it just helps me think about different elements I wouldn't otherwise, like dialogue which I always love to write (but seemingly rarely like to partake in) setting, mood...That's it. It helps set the mood. And I think the reader recognizes that mood and can immediately relate to the experience. Those seem to be people's favorites.
This starts with a guy who's on a date with this interesting and sweet person. It's all really inner dialogue and his reactions to what's going on in front of him. On the outside, he's very polite and outgoing. However, inside he's very smug, defiant, almost angry. Most importantly, in denial. Rather than enjoying the moment and this person's company, he stews in his head and tries to prove to, I guess, himself that he's gracefully moved on from this past relationship. He compares women and has this "see, I told you so," mentality. The funny thing is that he doesn't see how self destructive this train of thought is. And that's because he's too involved in these feelings. As a reader who is outside the box, you see how evident it is. In one part, he says, "I don't give you a second thought," but right after that, he gives that person more and more thought. This self contradiction was very funny to create and watch unfold. The end of the piece serves as the revelation and that is quite sad, but very healthy and right.
I mean, discussing these things are tricky because I'm such a guarded person. But by writing about these topics, people may make the connection and assumption that this is exactly what I'm going through. I'm usually hesitant to admit that stuff and say that it's sort of objective or just about an idea I had. And sometimes that's very truth. But you know what? I'm going to do something different this time. This is absolutely about myself and personal experience. Some of it is embellished and certain aspects are added, but the feeling is directly from my heart with this one. I won't give the timeline, but to give you an idea, this is based on something that happened months ago. There you go! Felt good. I've been thinking a lot about this. The idea that all the situations I am seemingly so afraid of are the same ones that I sometimes voluntarily put myself in. It was like that in college. And it's like that in my creative ventures. Ironic how that works. And I think that's one of the many struggles I face: Trying to coincide that fear with the excitement that I have deep inside for those same things... I don't know. By the way, that's another topic I'm writing about. Although I'm not too sure many people will relate to that.
Well that's all for now.
Thanks.
Monday, September 6, 2010
The Making of..."Baggage Claim"
Hi.
I'd say for the last 4 years, when I would write about love, whether that be in stories, poems or songs, they would become a bit more realistic, a bit more of a 'strings attached' mentality. That's a vast difference than the material I'd write back in high school. It's truly remarkable how our opinions can change. Only they don't truly change. I'd say they evolve based on our experiences. We can still be hopeless romantics while at the same time be annoyed at that idea. And that goes for professional decisions, other passions, etc.
For me, I've always tried to avoid the pitfalls of just writing about the dark and negative sides of love. That's a jaded point of view that I try to steer clear of on a daily basis. It's a once sided, invalid perspective of love and it's not doing the feeling justice. To hate the idea of love relationships so much would basically be to secretly admit how much you want to love the idea and how much power it has over you.
So in order to avoid the jaded pieces, I've often displayed the idea that love is so hard and infuriating and frightening, but those are also the same reasons why it's so beautiful. It's why you feel euphoric and it's why most experience great highs and terrible lows. I've tried to be aware of that idea when writing. It's hard to get two people on the same page, but once it happens, oh man... Different ways to display that is by brining in comedic elements to pinpoint the hard times. That sort of makes the reader chuckle, but at the same time they can relate to the feeling or hardships. Then I sometimes list the reasons why you love this person. I've used specific examples like smells, laughs, memories, kisses, whatever and those romantic elements become the forefront of the piece, while the comedic ideas of someone driving you nuts are the backbone of the piece. I've become stubborn about mentioning the good and bad. It's worked well but I am looking to branch out and at least sometimes, go back to pure and simple love writings that don't list the reasons why it could be hard or bad and just concentrates on the good. My past experiences have affected that style I had years ago. But I did one the other day called "You Know Who You Are" which I'll discuss later.
However, "Baggage Claim" is one of my recent typical pieces about the hardships and greatness of love, all at the same time. Its about how two people have so many personal issues (baggage) but still manage to come together, put that aside, and attempt this daunting journey that is a future together. It's one of the bravest things we could do besides becoming a parent, and it's also one of the hardest. We're all so different as people, no matter if we wear the same clothes, like the same food, etc. We've all seen different things growing up and process that differently. To pigeonhole people to these stereotypes is simple and settling, but probably not reality. So the difficulty of mixing issues and living together is intense. Sometimes beauty ensues, others it can become toxic. This is the anthem that we're going to overcome our issues and needs that may not blend well in a relationship. And I tried to use the idea of the baggage claim in an airport as a metaphor for that journey and there are some funny things in there. Hope you like it!
Unfortunately, November is quickly coming upon us. I've been writing at a faster and more efficient pace than I've ever experienced before. I hope that translates into growth and just good writing.
Thanks.
I'd say for the last 4 years, when I would write about love, whether that be in stories, poems or songs, they would become a bit more realistic, a bit more of a 'strings attached' mentality. That's a vast difference than the material I'd write back in high school. It's truly remarkable how our opinions can change. Only they don't truly change. I'd say they evolve based on our experiences. We can still be hopeless romantics while at the same time be annoyed at that idea. And that goes for professional decisions, other passions, etc.
For me, I've always tried to avoid the pitfalls of just writing about the dark and negative sides of love. That's a jaded point of view that I try to steer clear of on a daily basis. It's a once sided, invalid perspective of love and it's not doing the feeling justice. To hate the idea of love relationships so much would basically be to secretly admit how much you want to love the idea and how much power it has over you.
So in order to avoid the jaded pieces, I've often displayed the idea that love is so hard and infuriating and frightening, but those are also the same reasons why it's so beautiful. It's why you feel euphoric and it's why most experience great highs and terrible lows. I've tried to be aware of that idea when writing. It's hard to get two people on the same page, but once it happens, oh man... Different ways to display that is by brining in comedic elements to pinpoint the hard times. That sort of makes the reader chuckle, but at the same time they can relate to the feeling or hardships. Then I sometimes list the reasons why you love this person. I've used specific examples like smells, laughs, memories, kisses, whatever and those romantic elements become the forefront of the piece, while the comedic ideas of someone driving you nuts are the backbone of the piece. I've become stubborn about mentioning the good and bad. It's worked well but I am looking to branch out and at least sometimes, go back to pure and simple love writings that don't list the reasons why it could be hard or bad and just concentrates on the good. My past experiences have affected that style I had years ago. But I did one the other day called "You Know Who You Are" which I'll discuss later.
However, "Baggage Claim" is one of my recent typical pieces about the hardships and greatness of love, all at the same time. Its about how two people have so many personal issues (baggage) but still manage to come together, put that aside, and attempt this daunting journey that is a future together. It's one of the bravest things we could do besides becoming a parent, and it's also one of the hardest. We're all so different as people, no matter if we wear the same clothes, like the same food, etc. We've all seen different things growing up and process that differently. To pigeonhole people to these stereotypes is simple and settling, but probably not reality. So the difficulty of mixing issues and living together is intense. Sometimes beauty ensues, others it can become toxic. This is the anthem that we're going to overcome our issues and needs that may not blend well in a relationship. And I tried to use the idea of the baggage claim in an airport as a metaphor for that journey and there are some funny things in there. Hope you like it!
Unfortunately, November is quickly coming upon us. I've been writing at a faster and more efficient pace than I've ever experienced before. I hope that translates into growth and just good writing.
Thanks.
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